and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
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