you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Did you just buzz the apartment and throw shit at the window? Josh and rob came into my room and woke me up
Fuck you Ian. U owe me $3.65 cuz thasts what I thfrew at ur window trying to wake ur ass up. And fuck u for not giving a shit
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Just saw a dude dressed as captain america driving down the highway. He saluted me.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
