Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
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