i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
i think my mom watched the whole time
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
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