i don't plan on having that self control this summer
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Randomize
