Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
