I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Randomize
