Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Randomize