are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Randomize
