and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
Randomize