yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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