Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
pretty sure I called you last night to sing Hebrew to you.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize