Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
It was like watching Stephen Hawking try to swim.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
you just missed a great speech in which i almost coined the term "ass-ian" as in "my vaginal and ass-ian regions are no longer safe"
God please dont post that to facebook.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Randomize
