so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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