What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
