I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Someone just said “I need to use up this money before I’m tits up under the dirt” so I think I’m going to start using that in my daily vocabulary.
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
