My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
