the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
