you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
