i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
