I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
