I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Randomize
