At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
