I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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