i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
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