So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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