thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
