so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
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