Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
Randomize
