My living room is scattered with glow sticks wrappers, sparklers, face paint & beer cans?
It's not as cool looking when the drugs wear off, is it?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
