:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
mike is out of commission and cannot make breakfast. he's sitting with two frozen waffles on his face & smiling like an idiot.
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
