I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize