So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
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