My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
Randomize
