why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I'm glad I have good healthy relationships with my one night stands
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Randomize
