think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
