it was like fucking gandolphs beard
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I need a DD tuesday morning around 9 AM
I'm scared to ask why.....
1st bikini wax. Jose Cuervo is helping me prepare.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Randomize
