so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
You got the whole drunk bus to sing, "In The Jungle" while conducting with your glowsticks.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
