absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Randomize
