It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
we're so committed to being not committed
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
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