For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
I woke up to you in just boxers at my door at 7a.m. with you saying how many squrriels you counted on the walk back, then you made me penis shaped pancakes
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
You were face down in the punch bowl, humming the theme to jaws
That explains the stains on my shirt
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
It just wouldn't be valentines day if i didn't invite 90% of the guys i've slept with to go to the strip club with me
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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