We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
