did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
