Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
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