You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
He just made me apologize because his morning wood is NOT a laughing matter.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
