i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
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