he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize
