i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Randomize