we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
