That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize