Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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