so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I am spending my child support on dildos
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
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